Why Acknowledging Emotions Is a Leadership Must
The Leadership Skill You Can’t Ignore
What is the one thing you are annoyed about when communicating with others?
Probably, they don’t hear you.
Meaning they don’t acknowledge your feelings.
They ignore you.
Emotional intelligence is what makes or breaks a good leader. It is not just listening. How you hear others and show empathy makes the difference.
Today, you learn how to acknowledge emotions and become a better communicator.
Why Emotions Matter in Leadership
While we think we are rational, we are, in fact, quite irrational beings. Don’t thank me for this point because you already know that.
I want you to realize that we don’t think in our emotions. We often experience them without noticing.
They influence how you enjoy your lunch. They hijack you when you’re supposed to deliver an important presentation. They make you exhausted after a difficult conversation.
So, what is it about emotions?
Emotions steer your decision-making, relationships, and performance. Emotions are driving you or making you disengaged.
You cannot get rid of them. Emotions are a fundamental part of being human. They’re wired into our brains (yes, the famous survival instinct!).
However, you can manage your emotions with mindfulness and behavioral strategies. First of all, acknowledge their presence and impact.
On yourself. On others.
In leadership, emotions build trust. Emotionally intelligent leaders handle stress better. Emotions help you adapt to situations. They lead to fair and rational decisions. Emotions also help navigate conflicts effectively.
Leadership without emotions? It does not exist.
Benefits of acknowledging emotions
The sooner you accept you feel something and others feel something (perhaps different?), the better your communication.
Have you ever gone to a meeting without knowing what it would be about? That is how it could feel when you don’t care about your emotions. You are constantly under pressure.
Emotions are here to help you survive. So, why are you constantly stressed? Pressured? Annoyed? Wind up?
Maybe because you have low self-awareness. If you understand what triggers your emotions, you are a winner of the year. As you learn to be ready and in control.
Who does not love control?
There are a few generic benefits for acknowledging emotions, as you could read in a textbook:
- Building a trustworthy and respected atmosphere is grounded in addressing emotions. Recognize what’s happening, and you will build stronger relationships with your teams.
- Open dialogue is impossible without emotional awareness. How do people feel? How do you feel? Can you imagine how they will feel after hearing this? Can you sympathize with them?
- It is not what you say but how you say it. Leaders who acknowledge your feelings, show empathy, and support you are way more motivating than those who don’t listen/care.
Consequences of Ignoring Emotions
“Emotions are for female leaders.”
That is what I heard from one of my clients. He was adamant about keeping his face. No wonder his team didn’t like him. He used a lot of buzzwords but never really connected with his team.
When emotions are dismissed or overlooked, they don’t disappear — they fester. Unacknowledged feelings like frustration, anger, or anxiety can lead to increased stress, burnout, and a decrease in team morale.
People want to have a feeling that they are liked and fit in. That is why they seek appreciation and positive encouragement when they mess up things.
If this is missing, guess what? No one enjoys their job. Not the leader. Not the team. People just feel ghosted. Leaders feel not respected. And it all ends up in misunderstandings.
Do I see a tear in your eye?
Yes. You should be feeling pretty bad if you are like my client: “Emotions are for women.” Then, you get it all:
- High turnover: No emotional connection = no loyalty. Say bye!
- Decreased engagement: Don’t hunt productivity when you cannot make people feel good. It is not there.
- Poor relationships: No Friday beer excitement. Collaboration with cringe. And well, trust and rapport are your unfulfilled wish.
Ignoring emotions is damaging. How much can your team take?
How leaders can acknowledge emotions effectively
You’ve learned why you should be acknowledging emotions. I did some booboo on you when you don’t, too.
So, you may now feel like, “Okay, I get it, but how should I do it?”
Try one of the 3 activities:
1. Active play with your team
Scrap ice-breaking activities and spaghetti towers. Try emotion reading (not tarot reading, although that could also be fun).
It goes like this:
Setup:
- A group of participants (ideally 6–12 people).
- In each round, one or more players act out a short scene while pretending to feel a specific emotion.
- The rest of the group observes and then shares how the performance made them feel.
Instructions:
- Prepare Emotion Cards — Write different emotions on index cards (e.g., excitement, frustration, nervousness, confidence, indifference).
- Assign Roles — One or two players pick an emotion card and act out a short, everyday scenario (e.g., ordering coffee, giving a work update, greeting a friend). They must pretend to feel the assigned emotion but not explicitly name it.
- Observation & Discussion — After the scene, the audience shares:
- What they think the emotion was.
- How the performance made them feel.
- How would they react if this were real life?
- Reveal & Reflect — The actors reveal their assigned emotions. Discuss how different emotional expressions influence interactions.
Variations:
- Mixed emotions: Assign two different emotions to two actors in the same scene to explore conflicting feelings.
- Workplace scenarios: Act out leadership or teamwork situations to make it relevant to professional settings.
- Exaggerated vs. subtle: Have some rounds where emotions are exaggerated and others subtle, helping participants understand nuances.
And voila. This game helps your team to realize that emotions are always there and how they impact communication.
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2. Listening better
The other two are less playful but equally impactful.
Focused listening, listening without distractions, and active listening. All points towards the same thing. Listen to understand, not to respond.
4 questions for your consideration:
- What do people try to tell you?
- Why do they tell you that?
- How does it make you feel?
- How do they feel?
Listening to content is one thing. Reading body language and between the lines is another. Try it. For once.
3. Name the emotion
Self-awareness stands for understanding yourself. What do you feel? Why? Start with yourself and name your emotions.
It will help you validate others’ feelings. Can you imagine saying something like:
- “I see you’re feeling frustrated.”
- “It sounds like you’re feeling uncertain about the new changes. I appreciate you sharing your concerns.”
- “You seem really excited about this idea! I’d love to hear more about it.”
You don’t have to be a wizard to notice when someone is angry, annoyed, surprised, etc. Still, showing that you hear them will make your communication much better.
Final Thought
Effective communication means understanding. Understanding means listening. The better you listen, the better you understand.
When you understand, you can communicate on the point. When you communicate on the point, people are less confused.
It’s always WHAT and HOW. Emotions are hidden in your HOW.
Have a good one, Ivona
